The M Party of Five: Designer Jeans and Honesty

I saw a woman in the Wal-Mart parking lot the other day that was getting a stroller out of her van. I commented to her that she must be a mom too (at the time I was getting Madison out of her car seat). She laughed and said yeah, she had four girls with the oldest being 9. This woman then went on to say that she was lucky if she got a shower three times a week (note: she was wearing gym shorts, T-shirt, ponytail, and a visor....I was too, just in different colors). She was honest. I don't think most women are honest about it. Some are, I am. I don't have a job (one that pays me anyway, although I'm waiting for the someone to pay me my $100,000 since the national survey says that stay-at-home moms deserve this salary...check still hasn't come but I keep holding out hope) and I find myself with no time to take a shower every morning and get decked out in my designer jeans. I don't even think I could find my designer jeans in my closet if I wanted to, I'm sure they are in there under all of the stuffed animals that are waiting for their "stitches" and the clothes that need ironing. I'm also sure that they will still fit, never mind that I wear elastic-waisted shorts seven days a week so my view of my "size" is probably not the same as the size reflected on the tag in my designer jeans. I've always wondered how (and really why??) stay-at-home moms get up early, get their showers, put on their make-up, do their hair, get dressed in the latest trend to take their kids to school and then go home to have the baby spit up on them or finger paint smeared on the legs of their designer jeans or the bleach to dribble down the ruffled shirt or twist their ankle cooking in the kitchen while wearing the latest wedge sandal. These people exist, I have met them. Or I have met what they want people to believe they are. I am not this person, I am not like these people; nor do I want to be. I get up, hair goes in a ponytail, gym shorts and a t-shirt are my wardrobe, and flip flops are on my feet. If I have to go out in public, my red visor is on my head (even if my shirt is pink, I still wear the red visor). There are exceptions such as doctor appointments (which the kids go to every week it seems and I always get spit up on or a snotty nose wiped on my shirt because they can't stop crying due to the fact that their finger got pricked; which means the blood from the finger is on the back of my shirt where the kid is holding on for dear life while wiping their snotty nose on the front of my shirt) and trips to the school. But for the most part I only get to take a shower around midnight when everyone is asleep. I'm not complaining because I wouldn't want my life to be any other way.

This past week was the beginning of the school year. Morgan started 3rd grade and Molli started kindergarten. Madison has been sick all week which has made the week that much more stressful. I haven't slept in a week. I haven't slept more than four hours a night in a week (and these are not four consecutive hours). So if you see me in my gym shorts, t-shirt, and visor, don't look at me as if I could have dressed better because for the love of God, there is no way that I could have had the energy to pretend that I care how I am dressed.